Every so often me or a friend will come across a game in steam that just has to be shared. Not because it’s particularly good, but because it’s such a crazy game it makes you pause and wonder “wtf” – so welcome to “wtf gaming” a (hopefully) weekly column where we look at a few of these gems.

This week it’s a game called Heat. I’m not going to go into the game too much but here are some quotes that will give you a pretty good idea about what this game entails.

Go Forth and Multiply Start a family with other players or NPCs. During the process of love making, the male will have a chance of making the female pregnant. Once pregnant, the female will birth a newborn. The newborn grows to become a baby, the baby then grows up to be a child, the child eventually becomes an adult.

A second option is to adopt from an orphanage by purchasing a baby basket in the shipping catalog. The baby will be inside the basket delivered to you. Adoption is very expensive, but provides a guaranteed outcome, whereas the first option may not reliably result in pregnancy due to the possibility for weak seed.

Once your kids become adults you can equip them with outfits, gear, and weapons. They can help protect you when you are online. However, other players may decide to capture and restrain your adult kin, so best keep them packing heat. Seats of Power As President, you own the Whitehouse, a section of land south of the monument, one intern, a golden gun, and two secret service NPCs. You also get to set and collect a President’s land tax. The Sheriff gets a deputy, and also some firepower to deliver justice. As Chief, you have a section of land, a grand tepee, and 3 warriors. The Governor gets the Cottonwood Plantation, plenty of farm seed, and 3 peons.

Sound like a game that interests you? It’s in early access over on steam.. Personally? I’ll take a hard pass.

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